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Well, since writing about "needs" we have gotten to talk. He was scared about how I was feeling. I didn't mean to scare him per se, I just needed to get it off of my chest.

How I love him. More than I can even begin to translate into words.

So the next day we talk again and he said he thought about what I said and he didn't realize that I would have so much on my plate when it was suggested that I be the one to do the majority of the wedding planning.

He offered to take up more than the lion's share. But now we've mostly got it all planned out how we are going to do things and it has taken many many many talks to do so.

I think it is going to be very good.

He told me that he had reflected on one of the ideas and he found it to be the best plan and asked me if that made me feel better.


Knowing that I was heard and my need to talk and be HEARD was met - THAT is what makes me feel better.

I told him that my mood was probably just a temporary thing and that when I do finally get that ring on my finger (see, its supposed to be with the jeweler right now) I would be like WHEEEEEEE and all crazy insane with the wedding again.

It is just hard to claim that you are engaged when you don't have the ring on your finger, you know? Well, a guy wouldn't know but a gal would.

So I feel good that my need was met. I feel that I was heard and understood and I no longer feel "apathetic".


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 3rd, 2003 09:53 am (UTC)
>>It is just hard to claim that you are engaged when you don't have the ring on your finger, you know? Well, a guy wouldn't know but a gal would.

Maybe you can explain this to Drew sometime. I cannot get it through his skull why I want what is his "one piece of jewelry" is so important to me. I say it's a girl thing and he just raises an eyebrow.

Feb. 3rd, 2003 12:42 pm (UTC)
I have an idea
It might not be the best of ideas but maybe they will get the hint / point.

Or knowing our neanderthals (?sp) - not get it without a blunt object to the temple.

The idea is this - we don't tell people we are engaged. We continue to call our men our boyfriends.

When they want to know why, tell them something like "How can I honestly tell someone I'm engaged when I don't even have a ring to show them? How will they believe me?"

I have already been asked out. I'm not kidding. Not this last weekend but the weekend before I got asked out on a date. It turned out that I was being asked to be introduced to a friend of the person asking me as the person asking me is also engaged, but the guy KNOWS I'm engaged. Knew it when he asked me out.

But because of the lack of a ring, it appears that I am "open for business".

Just recently I had a guy tell me that until I have that ring showing other guys I am taken then I was fair game. Of course he also told me that there were men who would not care in the slightest and go for it all the same.

But the point is, without the ring, I don't FEEL engaged.

So if I decide to continue to call him "boyfriend" until I officially get the ring, and it hurts his feelings, maybe that is what it will take to get the ring on my finger.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )



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